Who is this person and why am I blogging? That is how I felt after I started this blog. Then I sat down and thought about why I wanted to blog…..crickets…..crickets. I have an amazing group of women that I look to for inspiration and they are all blogging. Maybe that is it? Maybe I want to be in the cool kids club. Then in the middle of a conversation (NOT about blogging) it hit me like a ton of bricks. Like I stopped talking mid sentence and stared off into space until my friend was all Hey Amy are you ok? Then it happened. Magic.
I was in the midst of a break up. One night while hanging out with my sister (feeling sorry for myself) she pointed out that while yes it was an ending (cue sappy music) it was also a beginning. But then something magic happened. It FELT like a beginning! So we did what we always do (it’s kind of our thing) we made a list. We started the WHO AMY WANTS TO BE LIST.
Fast forward 8 years later. I am hosting a Valentine’s Party for my girlfriends (YES I do that sort of thing) and as we were eating we were playing a game of questions in which a question gets asked and everybody answers. What has been you greatest accomplishment? Most everybody said the things you would totally expect and that honestly I thought I was going to say as well. My kids, graduating college, starting a business, over coming an obstacle type stuff. But then the magic happened again except this time it was like I was listening to somebody else speak and then I realized it was me. My greatest accomplishment is that list. Not the making of it but the steady markings the crossing things off of it! All but 3 things are done. Trip to Europe (plans are happening for that in 2020), run a 1/2 marathon (I run for training every month and the goal is Feb 2018), Skydiving ( I turn 40 next year, guess what I’m doing for my birthday!). That list has driven me, challenged me and made me certain at least once that somebody needed to check the handwriting to make sure I wrote it! I had not thought about that list as an accomplishment, in fact as I was listening to my friends answer the question I fully intended to say my son. Magic.
Today. I am not that same person anymore. Not by any stretch of the imagination and I honestly think it’s because of that list. I have become an adventurer, a goal crusher, a thrill seeker and a better more happy person! Magic. So why does all of this matter? Why is this important? Well hold on, we are not there yet!
I am a nerd. A certified dork. Yes. It. Is. True.
Now having said that, my husband and a group of our friends have started an adventure in Dungeons & Dragons 5th edition. I played when I was younger a couple of times but this edition is new and we really only thought we were going to play the one time for my husbands birthday. We built our characters, played, and got hooked! We play pretty regularly now. One night we were talking about our characters and my husband pointed out that the character I built is who I am in my head. Wait. What? That is crazy I built a Tiefling Palladin. Tieflings for those of you who don’t know or could care less have horns, a tail and have demon blood. Not necessarily bad especially mine as she is a Palladin which is basically a holy warrior. Ridiculous right??? He looked me dead in the eye and said yes tail and horns. Also, Adventurer. Warrior. Badass. Tell me you don’t see that in yourself. He was right. I see those things NOW. I envision those things when I am working up the courage to start my next adventure whether its kayaking, traveling, or trying a new recipe. I AM AN ADVENTURER, A WARRIOR, A BADASS. This is why I want to blog. I want to talk about what I am doing and how I am changing. I want to be intentional and I need to be accountable, so here it is! Accountability flying out into the universe, hold on to your hats ladies and gentlemen it’s going to be a bumpy ride but it’s also going to be alot of fun!
“Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose.” Steve Jobs